Emoting as a form of Intellegence

April 4, 2011

Tomorrow (Wednesday 27th April) I will be speaking at the YES Group in London on the subject of Emotional Intelligence. I am looking forward to going back to the YES group, I used to attend the group in 1993 after I attended Tony Robbins’ first ever UK event. Back then, there used to about 10-15 regulars, the group has been through many changes since, I have not spoken there since 2003, so it will be really fun.

Emotional Intelligence is great subject because emotions are much discussed in both psychology and NLP. Different psychologists have named different emotions as core emotions. These include, anger, disgust, fear, happiness, sadness and surprise (Ekman) to name a few. Daniel Goleman produced an Emotional Competency Interview to measure a person’s level of EI, i.e. how well a person can identify, assess, and control their emotions.

The word emotion is a nominalization for the verb/process of emoting. We rarely think of ourselves as emoting when we are angry, happy etc. We reflect on the events and the label of the emotion and ignore the feeling components of the emotion (emoting). In the evening at the YES group, I will be talking about how to increase your personal awareness so you are in touch with the processes of emoting.

Some people in NLP refer to certain emotions as negative, I disagree that emotions are negative, they are sign posts to direct attention. In an appropriate context its perfectly Ok to feel anger and disgust, in fact it’s good to be able to recognise those body sensations that are linked to these emotions. The sensations you feel give you a trigger to deal with the context. What is not so good, is if you become an angry person cut off from the sensations of the body, but just being angry. This is unhealthy from a physical and mental perspective.

There is so much talk in personal development today about being happy and joyful. Seminars often focus on the outer world of achieving external outcomes of high levels income, body type, ideal partner, a health regime etc etc.  None of these goals will bring you emotional stability or happiness. People chasing the external dream are like personal development robots. Emoting happiness is an internal process, a set of sensations you experience in your body and should not be reliant on external factors. Somewhere along the journey of life you christened the sensations as happiness and may have lost touch with the feelings. If you did, are you chasing the external factors you have linked with the feeling? This is an inside out loop. I say – get back in touch with the sensations you linked to being happy and celebrate your happiness as a natural state of being. Once you have that level of sensory awareness you can of course chase the external niceties of life (if you choose), the income, the cars and the holidays. These pleasant extras are just the icing on the cake, the real happiness comes from within.

So if you want to re-experience how you emote and how you can get in touch with you inner feelings come along to the YES group tomorrow it will be good to see you there.

You can book by following this link: click here

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